you obviously have


Right now I'm...

Listening to :
Nick Cave : Murder Ballads

Reading :
Defying Hitler

Occupation :

Weirdest Dream lately :
I dreamed I was on the "other side" when my Dad was passing. I spoke to him and made sure he was okay. Then I woke, and knew he was gone. 30 minutes later, we got the call from the hospital saying that his blood pressure had crashed in the last 30 minutes.

Currently working on :
A BTVS related story called "Long Goodbye" which deals with a member of the Watchers Council being vamped as part of an experiment.
Also completing my nanowrimo effort.



o Holz
o HazzardX
o Mike
o Wil
o Neil


o BuffyBB
o TV Sans Pity
o Sexylosers
o Slashdot
o Mils Page
o Dilbert
o The Onion
o Savage Love


o Information Clearing House
o Greg Palast
o Noam Chomsky Archive
o Zmag
o Want to Know
o What Really Happened
o Guerrillanews
o Spin Sanity
o Media Whores On Line
o TV News Lies

Of interest

o James Randi
o Sceptics dictionary
o Urban legends debunked
o JunkScience
o Numberwatch
o Museum of Hoaxes
o Free Encyclopedia
o Superstring Theory
o Steal This Book

Quality Smut

o Miss Tracys
o Kirstin Archives

Jan 2003
Feb 2003
Mar 2003
Apr 2003
May 2003
Jun 2003
Jul 2003
Aug 2003
Sep 2003
Oct 2003
Nov 2003
Dec 2003
Jan 2004
Feb 2004
Mar 2004
Apr 2004
May 2004
Jun 2004
Jul 2004
Aug 2004
Sep 2004
Oct 2004
Nov 2004
Dec 2004
Jan 2005
Feb 2005
Mar 2005
Apr 2005
May 2005
Jun 2005

A blog for that outspoken and aggressive member of the Buffy Bulletin Board.
This page is powered by Blogger.
   Monday, March 10, 2003

What we loose or leave behind

Something was running through my mind a lot last week, as I got a bit nostalgic while surrounded by the current crop of people I consider friends. It struck me just how many once upon a time good friends were no longer around. Not that they've died, you understand. They're just not my friends anymore.

People like A, who I was very good friends with, for example. I had known him for years, helped him get through college, holidayed with him, worked with him, even lived with him. I haven't spoken to him now in years. I know roughly where he lives, have his email address and phone number and all that, and yet I haven't had any contact with him at all. Granted, it was because we had a rather large falling out. But I'm not one to hold a grudge. A on the other hand, really is.

Now, he's just one example, but he's a good one for what I was thinking about. Our ex-friends, and how they become ex-friends. I was wondering if people are predominantly those who lose friends, or those who just leave them?

Take JW. I was best man at his wedding, was friends with both him and his wife and their families. We had an argument, of sorts, and that was that. JW and A are two examples of how I lost friends, through my own actions.

There are other friends of mine that I've just let fall by the wayside. We don't have much in common anymore. They moved away, or just fell in with a different crowd or different social scene. And at some point, I stopped making the effort to keep in touch. I don't return phone calls, or write emails, or whatever. I would classify them as friends I've left.

So, not to go all Carrie Bradshaw or anything, but are people primarily Losers or Leavers? Is it better to be one than the other?

If it was a person who was leaving job after job, as circumstances dictate, we would not think less of them. But if someone kept losing job after job, we would have to wonder if the fault wasn't with them, you know?

So if you've lost more friends than you've left, does that make you a problem friend? (Assuming of course, you can equate jobs with friends in that analogy.)

Comments: Post a Comment